In 2011, I started DietingFashions as a fashion blog. I had my second child late 2009 and I suddenly felt lost! It took me almost 2 years to lose the baby weight and it took a lot of diet and exercise to get me back on track.
Not many people knew but my mom began to develop a lump on her breast in 2011, which she masked as a bruise from when my toddler accidentally kicked her while sleeping. The lump was the size of a plum. It didn’t grow for years.
I remember that I threw myself into this blog as a creative outlet. My career was mentally taxing and my home life was exhausting with 2 kids under 4 years ago. My insecurities were growing out of control.
DietingFashions became a place I could review products, dress up and look pretty, and even earn revenue. It was a win!
I just wanted a peace of mind that I could earn a living doing what I find creative and not be burnt out. I had to find ME which seemed lost among my kids and family.
March 2011 with my kids.
In high school and college, my creative outlet was my poetry The Dead Poets’ Society. People would submit their poems and I would publish it. My greatest achievement was a group of students from Denmark submitted their poetry to my site as a class project.
So DietingFashions was an on and off blog that I maintained. I had all these ideas and stories but all remained in draft. I just could not keep up with the trends! It wasn’t me to try this trend or that. I was still put off by my body.
Why didn’t this lovely shirt fit me like it did before? Did it shrink or did I get fat? How come my feet got bigger and wider all of a sudden? Was that a clump of hair that just fell out?
Yes. My body was on strike. And I didn’t understand it any more. I felt like a failure. I felt old and miserable at 29.
Everything had a silver lining and it was my third pregnancy in 2012. She was unexpected. We were trying for our third child , but nothing for a really long time. I decided to just stop trying.
Sometimes, not stressing will bring rewards. Mid 2012, after I booked a Disney trip for the end of the year, I began to feel queasy just thinking about fish. It was the strangest thought while trying to eat this piece of tilapia and I couldn’t do it. ‘Am I pregnant?’
Yes I was. That’s also when I knew the blog had to be put on hold. Three kids running around while I wasn’t sure how mentally and physically prepared I was, the blog was definitely something I would revisit at a later time.
2013 photo of our little family.
I do think it is time I restart my blog. My journey is ongoing. It is not only fashion but mental, physical, and even a spiritual journey. I hope you will continue this journey with me.